Mental Health, Abuse and reporting in Women's Lacrosse

[laxguy516]

In the spirit of this threads title it is important to point out that this is a public forum and players, both high school & college read it. Some of their names are mentioned from time-to-time and its not always positive. As much as some of you may think they are fair game, your comments impact them and for some it is negative for their mental health. I know, you think "well then they shouldn't read this forum". Let's remember who the adults are........

[Njm]

As for the Colgate situation there are no words - not for them, not for their coach Kathy Taylor. And the buck doesn’t stop at wlax btw - mlax is suffering at the hands of a divisive coach as well with a very bad attitude & a pretty resume. (Hired of course by Nicky Moore) And there are others at Colgate who shouldn’t be leading young people into their next chapter as well but I don’t have firsthand experience with those so I won’t comment there.
This school universally rejects the encouragement & support of student well being. They have covered their sins a hundred times since Nicky Moore became AD and they continued that trend through her forced move from Colgate to Cornell. Yes - she was assisted by the university to move on to a better program. Colgate wanted this AD gone. It was Colgate’s gain to a large degree but it’s definitely Cornell’s loss. Nicky Moore helped cover Kathy Taylor’s tracks at Colgate and she was given the final decision whether Taylor would stay or not at Colgate after the independent investigation. Sidebar, Ryan Thompson who was the “independent” investigator was hired by Colgate and knew Kathy Taylor and her basketball coach/son in law for years. (They were at Niagara together in another sordid story.) So it was not an independent & unbiased investigation. Nicky Moore, was initially tasked with running an investigation into the abuse but was removed for bullying the players during the individual “confidential” meetings. She told the girls “I am going to tell Kathy Taylor everything you say” so they wouldn’t say anything negative. At one point, she even had coach Taylor stop by the office when one of the players was waiting outside Moore’s office for her private meeting. And that girl was struggling with her mental health. I could fill pages with the transgressions of Moore & Taylor & how Colgate supported them but at the end of the day it is the university who chose to keep her. I was told by the president’s asst that the president is “everyone’s boss”. So then maybe it’s his fault even though he never spoke to one player or parent about this matter. He completely avoided it. As if it wasn’t enough of a guilt offering when the school allowed everyone who quit the team to keep their scholarships - now the president doesn’t want to touch any part of this matter. But, he didn’t hesitate to jump on tv to talk about Colgate’s celebrated Covid policies. The guy couldn’t give one minute of his time to the matter of flagrant abuse on his own wlax team but tv/photo op - of course! Brian Casey is a total disgrace.
I understand there will be skepticism out there. I fully expect it. But I’ve seen too much. I’ve heard too much. And I know way too much to let even a small opportunity go by without saying something. If this testimony helps one student or student athlete to choose a different school - great! And until Colgate effects a total administrative overhaul, please do not send your child there. If abuse is supported in one area of a school, it has the potential to be anywhere at that school. Tolerance of abuse within any institution is a philosophy, not an isolated incident. Case in point - Kathy Taylor is still coaching at Colgate despite years of verified & documented abuse. Let’s see if they renew her contract too.

[Brownlax]

As for the Colgate situation there are no words - not for them, not for their coach Kathy Taylor. And the buck doesn’t stop at wlax btw - mlax is suffering at the hands of a divisive coach as well with a very bad attitude & a pretty resume. (Hired of course by Nicky Moore) And there are others at Colgate who shouldn’t be leading young people into their next chapter as well but I don’t have firsthand experience with those so I won’t comment there.
This school universally rejects the encouragement & support of student well being. They have covered their sins a hundred times since Nicky Moore became AD and they continued that trend through her forced move from Colgate to Cornell. Yes - she was assisted by the university to move on to a better program. Colgate wanted this AD gone. It was Colgate’s gain to a large degree but it’s definitely Cornell’s loss. Nicky Moore helped cover Kathy Taylor’s tracks at Colgate and she was given the final decision whether Taylor would stay or not at Colgate after the independent investigation. Sidebar, Ryan Thompson who was the “independent” investigator was hired by Colgate and knew Kathy Taylor and her basketball coach/son in law for years. (They were at Niagara together in another sordid story.) So it was not an independent & unbiased investigation. Nicky Moore, was initially tasked with running an investigation into the abuse but was removed for bullying the players during the individual “confidential” meetings. She told the girls “I am going to tell Kathy Taylor everything you say” so they wouldn’t say anything negative. At one point, she even had coach Taylor stop by the office when one of the players was waiting outside Moore’s office for her private meeting. And that girl was struggling with her mental health. I could fill pages with the transgressions of Moore & Taylor & how Colgate supported them but at the end of the day it is the university who chose to keep her. I was told by the president’s asst that the president is “everyone’s boss”. So then maybe it’s his fault even though he never spoke to one player or parent about this matter. He completely avoided it. As if it wasn’t enough of a guilt offering when the school allowed everyone who quit the team to keep their scholarships - now the president doesn’t want to touch any part of this matter. But, he didn’t hesitate to jump on tv to talk about Colgate’s celebrated Covid policies. The guy couldn’t give one minute of his time to the matter of flagrant abuse on his own wlax team but tv/photo op - of course! Brian Casey is a total disgrace.
I understand there will be skepticism out there. I fully expect it. But I’ve seen too much. I’ve heard too much. And I know way too much to let even a small opportunity go by without saying something. If this testimony helps one student or student athlete to choose a different school - great! And until Colgate effects a total administrative overhaul, please do not send your child there. If abuse is supported in one area of a school, it has the potential to be anywhere at that school. Tolerance of abuse within any institution is a philosophy, not an isolated incident. Case in point - Kathy Taylor is still coaching at Colgate despite years of verified & documented abuse. Let’s see if they renew her contract too.

Well, they just lost to Siena so they are 0-6 on the year.

[LaxDadMax]

As for the Colgate situation there are no words - not for them, not for their coach Kathy Taylor. And the buck doesn’t stop at wlax btw - mlax is suffering at the hands of a divisive coach as well with a very bad attitude & a pretty resume. (Hired of course by Nicky Moore) And there are others at Colgate who shouldn’t be leading young people into their next chapter as well but I don’t have firsthand experience with those so I won’t comment there.
This school universally rejects the encouragement & support of student well being. They have covered their sins a hundred times since Nicky Moore became AD and they continued that trend through her forced move from Colgate to Cornell. Yes - she was assisted by the university to move on to a better program. Colgate wanted this AD gone. It was Colgate’s gain to a large degree but it’s definitely Cornell’s loss. Nicky Moore helped cover Kathy Taylor’s tracks at Colgate and she was given the final decision whether Taylor would stay or not at Colgate after the independent investigation. Sidebar, Ryan Thompson who was the “independent” investigator was hired by Colgate and knew Kathy Taylor and her basketball coach/son in law for years. (They were at Niagara together in another sordid story.) So it was not an independent & unbiased investigation. Nicky Moore, was initially tasked with running an investigation into the abuse but was removed for bullying the players during the individual “confidential” meetings. She told the girls “I am going to tell Kathy Taylor everything you say” so they wouldn’t say anything negative. At one point, she even had coach Taylor stop by the office when one of the players was waiting outside Moore’s office for her private meeting. And that girl was struggling with her mental health. I could fill pages with the transgressions of Moore & Taylor & how Colgate supported them but at the end of the day it is the university who chose to keep her. I was told by the president’s asst that the president is “everyone’s boss”. So then maybe it’s his fault even though he never spoke to one player or parent about this matter. He completely avoided it. As if it wasn’t enough of a guilt offering when the school allowed everyone who quit the team to keep their scholarships - now the president doesn’t want to touch any part of this matter. But, he didn’t hesitate to jump on tv to talk about Colgate’s celebrated Covid policies. The guy couldn’t give one minute of his time to the matter of flagrant abuse on his own wlax team but tv/photo op - of course! Brian Casey is a total disgrace.
I understand there will be skepticism out there. I fully expect it. But I’ve seen too much. I’ve heard too much. And I know way too much to let even a small opportunity go by without saying something. If this testimony helps one student or student athlete to choose a different school - great! And until Colgate effects a total administrative overhaul, please do not send your child there. If abuse is supported in one area of a school, it has the potential to be anywhere at that school. Tolerance of abuse within any institution is a philosophy, not an isolated incident. Case in point - Kathy Taylor is still coaching at Colgate despite years of verified & documented abuse. Let’s see if they renew her contract too.

Actually 0-7. And looking at their next 5 games (Navy, American, Cornell, Bucknell, Loyola), they will prob be 0-12, before getting to their most winnable game -- Lafayette.

If Taylor is employed by Colgate in mid-May, you know they just don't care about athletics.
Well, they just lost to Siena so they are 0-6 on the year.

[Travelmore22]

It is shocking that this coach is still at the helm of any lacrosse program given the pervasive abuse that has been documented. Young women athletes deserve so much more. How can Colgate justify retaining this coach after so many brave young women have called out the toxic and abusive situation??

[njbill]

I've been a defender of Taylor's over the past couple of years, but there is no way getting around the fact that 'Gate's record has been miserable. Whatever the reason (and I'm not intending to reopen the old can of worms), the results have been very disappointing to say the least.

Taylor had won everywhere she'd coached before taking the Colgate job. Two NY Class A titles at F-M, Nattys in Div. 3 (Cortland) and Div. 2 (Lemoyne). She wasn't going to win a national championship at Colgate, but seriously contending at the top of the Patriot League and making some noise here and there in the East seemed within the realm of possibility.

I believe her contract is up after this season. The interim AD is now the permanent AD. Does Taylor want to stay? She's in her early 60s. Has a bunch of grandchildren nearby (I think). Maybe she is ready to retire. Even if she wants to stay, what does the AD think? Don't know. My sense is that wlax is not way up there on the priority list. It is not a big sport with alums. I'd love to see the program turn around. Someway, somehow.

[Travelmore22]

When a coach has a 0-7 record and numerous allegations of abuse it seems incredible that she would have an option of retaining her job.

[Relax77]

When a coach has a 0-7 record and numerous allegations of abuse it seems incredible that she would have an option of retaining her job.

Yep. But there has to be a reason why they stuck by her. Seems like it would’ve been easier to just cut her loose. Maybe more to the story.

[Travelmore22]

I have heard about enough abuse that I can’t imagine anything that would justify it or constitute “more.” It appears Colgate cares about neither a safe environment for its student athletes nor about having a winning program.

[Njm]

I wish this only affected athletics. But even if it did, approx 2/3 of Colgate’s student body participates in sports. This school’s current philosophy and environment of abuse trickles down from the top, so it has the ability to affect every single part of the school…NOT just athletics.
Please - don’t roll the dice with your son or daughter at Colgate. Not right now. There are certainly many other really good schools out there for you to consider. Colgate is showing us who they are - I think we should listen to them.

[TNLAX]

A lot of college sports players have anxiety and panic attacks because of the constant pressure they feel. Most of them are young and don't even talk about it with anyone because they perceive it as a weakness. We should encourage them to talk to professionals who can help them with this. I'd like to share this article that talks about what to do when having a panic attack. I hope that young players on this forum read it because they might recognize the symptoms and take measures to help them with stress, anxiety, and panic attacks.

[Red4Life]

To all on this important thread -

Mental illness, Anxiety, panic, isolation etc. are all VERY VERY VERY real parts of many high performing high school and especially Collegiate student athletes. There are endless stories of self harm and suicide at the HS & College level. Many stories are quickly hushed as schools and coaches are fearful of the reputational damage or responsibility that may be associated with this tragic event.
There is an outstanding organization that was launched roughly 4 years ago by the family and teammates / friends of a Duke Women’s lax player who took her life following an up and down rehab experience after damaging her knee.

https://www.morgansmessage.org/

In a nutshell - student / Athletes submit application to become An Ambassador - go thru a training exercise and bring the topic of mental health into their locker rooms! Conversations are lead , minds and hearts are opened and a sense of “we are your family and all are here to lean on” is created.

In a squad of 40-45 - without question at least 10-15% of the athletes are experiencing heightened anxiety and some signs of depression. There is a strong sense that “I am the only one who feels like this” that our “elite” youth feel. They don’t want to let down themselves, their families, their home communities etc. and they don’t know how to break the ice and wave a flag that says “I’m hurting ….on the inside”!
There are horror stories about various coaches in all sports who don’t embrace the mental side of an athlete….with some very very bad outcomes.

As hard as it is for the passionate fan / parent / neighbor etc to realize - these are truly just kids - with a lifetime of real wins / losses to tackle. One gntee in the evolution of an athlete after college / no boss is going to give an underperformed a raise or promotion because they netted 3 goals in a crucial game when they were 20!

Parents - check in on your kids - give them space to rest their minds and bodies……as I joked with one dad who was a bit skeptical when he privately shared his daughter was struggling a bit mentally - don’t worry - even if she’s in sweats for a game or two - you can still cook or pour drinks at the tailgate!

Cheers to all!

[Brownlax]

To all on this important thread -

Mental illness, Anxiety, panic, isolation etc. are all VERY VERY VERY real parts of many high performing high school and especially Collegiate student athletes. There are endless stories of self harm and suicide at the HS & College level. Many stories are quickly hushed as schools and coaches are fearful of the reputational damage or responsibility that may be associated with this tragic event.
There is an outstanding organization that was launched roughly 4 years ago by the family and teammates / friends of a Duke Women’s lax player who took her life following an up and down rehab experience after damaging her knee.

https://www.morgansmessage.org/

In a nutshell - student / Athletes submit application to become An Ambassador - go thru a training exercise and bring the topic of mental health into their locker rooms! Conversations are lead , minds and hearts are opened and a sense of “we are your family and all are here to lean on” is created.

In a squad of 40-45 - without question at least 10-15% of the athletes are experiencing heightened anxiety and some signs of depression. There is a strong sense that “I am the only one who feels like this” that our “elite” youth feel. They don’t want to let down themselves, their families, their home communities etc. and they don’t know how to break the ice and wave a flag that says “I’m hurting ….on the inside”!
There are horror stories about various coaches in all sports who don’t embrace the mental side of an athlete….with some very very bad outcomes.

As hard as it is for the passionate fan / parent / neighbor etc to realize - these are truly just kids - with a lifetime of real wins / losses to tackle. One gntee in the evolution of an athlete after college / no boss is going to give an underperformed a raise or promotion because they netted 3 goals in a crucial game when they were 20!

Parents - check in on your kids - give them space to rest their minds and bodies……as I joked with one dad who was a bit skeptical when he privately shared his daughter was struggling a bit mentally - don’t worry - even if she’s in sweats for a game or two - you can still cook or pour drinks at the tailgate!

Cheers to all!

Thank you so much for posting!

[kidsgame]

I wish this only affected athletics. But even if it did, approx 2/3 of Colgate’s student body participates in sports. This school’s current philosophy and environment of abuse trickles down from the top, so it has the ability to affect every single part of the school…NOT just athletics.
Please - don’t roll the dice with your son or daughter at Colgate. Not right now. There are certainly many other really good schools out there for you to consider. Colgate is showing us who they are - I think we should listen to them.

I found this on 2adays spot on!

"This team has been systematically broken down year on year under Kathy Taylor. To the point that they are now incapable of beating a decent D3 team. Kathy Taylor might have been a very good D2 coach but whatever magic she had is long gone. (which was likely easily recruited great talent in the upstate New York market at a lower academic school masking mediocre coaching- but I digress). More specifically, Taylor makes zero in game and halftime adjustments. This Coach will see a train approaching literally from 2 miles away and continue to walk right into its path. Virtually every game in 2024 the opponent outshoots Colgate 3 to 1. The defense plays a soft man to man coverage leading to inordinate amounts of free shooting space calls and after going down by 4 or 5 goals they then try to increase man to man pressure leading to numerous passes to cutters scoring or just one on one breakdowns leading to 10 point or more losses. The offense is simply scared to make a mistake and are in the bottom 5 percent in the country in shots attempted , goals made, one of the absolute worst in D1 in turnovers and one of the worst in the country in draw controls. Kathy Taylor is the head coach and solely accountable for the outcomes of this program. Whether your are in the tiny fraction of parents who like her or not and no matter how one feels about former and current players allegations of abuse by her, coaches are ultimately judged on wins and losses. And don’t give me “well there are other things more important than wins and loses”, because these kids were all academic high performers coming into college and would achieve off the field in any environment. Team GPA has been consistent and high well before Coach Taylor was hired. In sum, Kathy Taylor you should do the proper thing and step aside for the program to move forward and the ladies who remain to have any chance of salvaging a true student athlete experience. Sometimes true leadership requires selfless sacrifice. Colgate, if Kathy Taylor does not resign, which she likely should have already, you have a professional responsibility to immediately relieve her of her duties for those 20 plus student athletes who prematurely left the program under her leadership and the 20+ current players (at least half of which loathe the day they decided to play under this coach)."

[Quill]

Checking in on kids and giving them space to rest is key!

[Red4Life]

Checking in on kids and giving them space to rest is key!

Always amazed on how many well educated and well meaning parents seem to overlook this important aspect- fearing if their child doesn’t participate in every off season club team / workout / special this / special that they will somehow fall out of favor with a coach.

[Quill]

FOMO is real!!