WestConn Lacrosse

[Westconnmlax]

We would first like to send our deepest condolences to the Graham and Chapman families. This loss is immeasurable, but the love the boys created throughout their eighteen years of life is also immeasurable. We will never forget their smiles, their laughs, their successes, their ambitions, and their love. We are all praying for a full and speedy recovery for Trey Massaro, who undoubtedly has a tough road ahead of him. His WestConn Lacrosse family is here to support him and his family in any way we can, and we are excited for his return, when he is ready.
Tyler and Jake are often defined by the sport they loved to play, but to the people who knew them, they were much more. Before they ever picked up a stick, they were a son, a brother, a grandson, a cousin, a nephew, and a devoted friend.

In the years leading up to high school and college, their parents spent countless hours having catches with them in the yard, driving them to practices, games, tournaments, and camps. They experienced the joy of seeing them scoring a game winning goal and having the team chase them around the field. They talked with them on the ride home after a tough loss. They watched them build lifelong friendships with their teammates and unbreakable bonds with their coaches. They watched their little boys grow into young adults. Those memories are irreplaceable. Whether they knew it or not, their parents were shaping their character every step of the way.

Tyler and Jake didn't have the success they had, or get recruited to play college lacrosse by mistake. They were both excellent players with undeniable talents on the field. Only 12% of high school players go on to play collegiate lacrosse; by this standard Tyler and Jake were elite in the sport they loved. In high school the two were a dynamic duo; Tyler the big strong ox that had the ability to create his own opportunity, and Jake the smart player who understood spacing and was a terror off-ball. Tyler's favorite target was his best friend Jake. Both gave 100% effort on the field and always shared in each other's success. Everyone could see that chemistry carried over from the field. The boys lived in the same dorm and it was a rare occurrence if you saw one of them without the other. One of the reasons they played so well together is because of their close bond off the field.

As a college coach we often just look at a player's ability to play the game. We spend a lot of time recruiting and evaluating players, but once a player enters our program the most valuable skill is their character. It is the character that makes a good player into a great player, it is the character that makes an average player into a captain and a leader of men. Although we were robbed of the experience of seeing Jake and Tyler grow within our program, I have no doubt that they would have grown into excellent young men and leaders.
After our fall ball scrimmage I realized I didn't get Tyler in the game, so I texted him that “it wasn't on purpose and you deserved to see some minutes, I will try and make it up to you this spring”. Tyler responded with “it's all good, I felt like I didn't play well in practice all week anyways. It was a blast to have that experience Saturday watching and being there with the boys anyway”. It was at that moment as a coach that I knew we had a special person. He got what WestConn Lacrosse was about: being there for the boys and loving the moments. It takes most players their entire career to understand that, and Tyler got that within his short time here. I’d like to think that had something to do with our leadership, but the reality is his family taught him that over his eighteen years of life.

Earlier this fall, when a large group of freshmen missed a team lift, the team leaders ran them on the hill we have here on our campus. Jake, being one of those freshmen, finished the run first. He then went right up to our Captain, looked him right in the eyes and said “I will never miss a lift again”; he never did after that. Jake could have dogged the run and blown off the message that our leaders were trying to convey but he didn't. He was grounded in reality and had passion to not only play the game he loved but compete for playing time. The same way he attacked life, he attacked that hill. For those who knew Jake, they knew that he was a competitor, a great teammate, and the best locker room guy you could ask for. Whether it was going above and beyond to try and make teammates laugh when having a tough day, giving everyone in his dorm hall a nickname, or giving a junior his first cigar at a party, Jake was always there to lift everyone’s spirits. We know that losing Jake means losing a piece of our heart.

There's no playbook or man-up play that teaches us how to deal with losing two of our teammates, and words cannot adequately express what we are feeling right now. The only thing we can do now is to do our best to honor their character and commitment by being the best versions of ourselves. When we hold the door open for someone walking into a building, we do it because that’s what Tyler and Jake would have done. When we step on the practice field, we will give it our all because that’s what Tyler and Jake would have done. When one of us is having a tough day, we will put our arm around each other and tell him it’s going to be okay, because that’s what Tyler and Jake would have done. When we win a championship, we will look up at the sky knowing that they are celebrating with us, because if it was any one of us, we know that’s what Tyler and Jake would have done. And when the warmth of the sun shines on our faces, we will know its Tyler and Jake celebrating the small victories, or picking up our chins in the most devastating losses. They will be our brothers forever and we will never forget the moments they shared with us both on and off the field.

Our team will try to find solace through the medicine game and we hope this brings spiritual healing to our team and lacrosse community. The love we have for Tyler and Jake can be a form of powerful action if we all choose it to be. The Graham’s have already demonstrated this by starting the Tyler Graham Foundation, which will raise money to benefit future generations of lacrosse players. In lieu of flowers, Tyler’s loved ones would like you to consider a donation payable to the Tyler Graham Foundation, P.O. Box 732, Colchester, CT 06415 or donate to this link. https://tylergrahamfoundation.com/.../tyler-graham...

The Chapman family requests that donations to honor Jake's memory be made to benefit other youth to enjoy the game of lacrosse as he did. Please send donations to Colchester Youth Lacrosse, PO Box 355, Colchester 06415 or Bacon Academy Boys Lacrosse Team c/o Bacon Academy Athletics, 611 Norwich Ave. Colchester 06415

Western Connecticut State Lacrosse
31 & 32 Family Forever

[Laxwarrior]

Thoughts and prayers to all those affected.

This type of accident was one of the things that kept me up at night as a parent when your kid is hours away at college.